Why did I eat at that Chinese Buffet last weekend? (And why I'll probably do it again.)

It started, like all great regrets, with an innocent family request:“Hey, wanna take the boys to the Chinese Buffet?"

Oh no. Not the buffet. Last time I visited that buffet I felt bloated and full for days. All that chicken fried rice, neon sweet-and-sour chicken, and a suspiciously endless supply of greasy egg rolls.

It was my dad, of course, I said yes.

Because when your dad says he wants to see what kind of hole the boys, his grandsons, can put in a buffet and top it all off with buckets of ice cream, you don’t say no. You show up, you hold your paper napkin like a sword, and you enter the coliseum.

We Knew This Would Happen

We all knew what this would be.

A three-plate minimum. Conversations that start with “Remember when…” and end with “Are you gonna finish that BBQ rib?” My dad returning from the buffet with a pile of food, potentially forgetting he can go up as many times as he wants and my youngest son sitting with a plate completely full of mac n cheese with one piece of garlic bread.

And me, sitting at the table 45 minutes later, quietly wondering:“Why did I eat at that Chinese buffet yesterday?”

Because Family Is Complicated (and Delicious)

Let’s be honest: Food is more than fuel. It’s culture, comfort, and yes, it also contributes to inflammation and poor gut health.

We go to the buffet not because it’s the pinnacle of nutritional science, but because it’s tradition. It’s affordable. It’s familiar. And someone always says something weird over the crab legs.

But if you're trying to live a healthier lifestyle (or if your gut is still sending passive-aggressive texts this morning), there is a way to do the buffet better.

How to Survive a Family Buffet Without Total and complete Regret

Start with veggies: Before you get too close to the fried section, pile your plate with sautéed green beans, broccoli, mushrooms, or any vaguely recognizable plant matter. Fiber helps slow down digestion which helps you feel full for longer and prevents overeating all the fried and breaded chicken or dessert table.

Prioritize protein: Go for grilled chicken, shrimp, tofu, or beef stir-fry options that aren’t swimming in sugary sauces. Even egg drop soup or a hard-boiled egg can help add protein to keep you full longer (and curb the sugar spike that comes from that third sesame ball).

Treat rice and noodles like side dishes—not main courses: You don’t need a mountain of white rice. A spoonful or two is fine if you love it, but don’t let it displace the veggies and proteins that’ll help you feel satisfied instead of sleepy.

Pick your indulgences: Let’s be real—you’re getting a sugar donuts because they were your grandmother's favorite and taking that first bite reminds you of her. She was a small but mighty woman. That’s fine! Just don’t start with it. If you begin with balance, you’ll enjoy your favorites more without needing six of everything “just because it’s there.”

Drink water like you’re being paid for it. Water helps digestion, keeps you feeling fuller, and balances out all the salty sauces your ancestors never intended you to consume in gallon-sized portions.

Final Thoughts from the Buffet

Will you feel a little bloated afterward? Probably. Likely. Will you question your life choices around plate number three? Almost certainly. Will you do it again next year when Dad texts “Buffet this weekend?”Absolutely.

Because traditions matter. Family matters. And every now and then, eating way too many pieces of Chinese BBQ chicken cooked in highly processed vegetable oil while laughing until your stomach hurts is just as nourishing to the soul, on a rare occasion, as a kale smoothie.

Just focus on cleaning it up that following week with meeting your water goals, focusing on grass finished meats and organic vegetables. You can recover nutritionally and have some great memories with your family while possibly teaching them how to more helpfully approach that beloved Buffet. And next time, make it clear its your turn to pick the restaurant.